To Procreate or Not to Procreate? That is the Question. Part III
Quick recap people: So far my two main issues with having kids are the toll it will take on my relationship with my husband and the toll it could take on the planet.
I have thought seriously of adopting ever since I got married mainly because of my concern that the world is already over populated and that by having kids I will kind of be a hypocrite because I’ve always maintained that there are too many of us humans running around screwing things up.
Honestly, it just breaks my heart to think of all those children out there desperately wanting someone to love them. I know first hand how easy it is to fall in love with a child that isn’t biologically yours because, as a teacher, there were kids that I just adored so much that I would have taken them home with me if they were in need of a family.
There are some clear advantages to adopting. One is that you get to help a child in need. You also have the opportunity to actually get to know each other and see if your personalities gel (with older kids of course). Of course there are the advantages that aren’t as high-minded like avoiding pregnancy/birth and the effect it has on the body and bypassing that first sleepless year.
Now, parents who have biological children will tell you that there is nothing in the world like having a baby and I am sure that’s true. However, only the people who have done both, conceived and adopted, really know the difference between the two, if there is one. Of course it isn’t exactly PC to say “My adopted kid is great and all, but I just love my own flesh and blood sooooo much more”, so it can be hard to get an honest answer.
I have thought a lot about doing both, adopting and giving birth, but my concern is that no matter what I do my adopted child would always feel less loved. I actually worry that I might overcompensate and pay less attention to my biological child just to avoid this. I’ve since thought that a way to avoid this might be to adopt siblings, as they are often split up. It would allow them to still have someone with “their own blood” in their life, someone they can see themselves reflected in.
If anyone out there has any experience with this, first hand or otherwise, I’d love to hear it. I could definitely use a helping hand.
~Laura
Labels: adoption, baby, Laura, Procreate
Share
